One Liners
Quotes
"The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music."- George Carlin See all 322 of our quotes >>
A.K.A Throwing Up ...
feed the fishSee 90 other ways to say it >>
A.K.A Pooping ...
Going into laborWe have 145 other ways to say that too >>
Really Bad Names
Woody Liquor79 examples of what not to name your kids >>
Confucius Say...
Confucius say man who make love to girl on hill... he not on level.See 80 pearls of twisted wisdom from Confucius >>
Yo Mama!
Yo Mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!Find out 151 things about Yo Mamma here >>
Pick Up Lines
Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.Learn all 146 of our can't miss pick up lines >>
Rejection Lines
You're the first guy since I had my big change to hit on me. So, sweetie, how open minded are you?Prepare yourself with 52 rejection lines >>
Funnybox Asks
Why is it that night falls but day breaks?Ponder 191 unponderable questions >>
Fulldeckisms
A 1.0 in a 4.5 installation.Compare people you know with 200 comparable fulldeckisms >>
Answering Machine Messages
I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I CAN come to the phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone NOW, recording this message, but I'm doing this NOW, while you're listening to it LATER, except for you I guess it's NOW, like, when you're listening to it... I mean, like, wait, gosh. This is so confusing.Consider 124 messages for your answering machine >>
Uncatagorifiable One Liners
It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.Memorize all 55 of these other one liners for all occasions >>